This academic year, I decided to end my hiatus with my dissertation. And so I started again reading and writing my paper. It is very challenging because of the loads of tasks I need to accomplish weekly for my teaching job. I have two (2) designations that consume so much of my time and energy.
Even if night times supposed to be my free time to work on my paper, I always end the day tired. Even if I am tired, I spend my nights either preparing for the activities for the next days or weeks or working on pending reports.
No matter what time management technique I apply, it seems that 24 hours a day is not enough.
But time is out of my control.
I have control of only the things that I do, which is why, no matter how impossible it is, I decided to pursue proposal defense this semester. I hope that everything will fall into place because I am tired of doing many things which are taking me nowhere.
At least, these efforts in finishing my paper someday will give me the degree and the opportunity to contribute to the field I am exploring.
Honestly, nowadays, I am not getting the appetite I once had in doing the tasks for my teaching job because I am no longer teaching. The admin tasks (2 designations) are consuming so much of me, demotivating me. To save myself from the brink of hating this job, I am refocusing my best efforts on finishing my dissertation paper.
And yes, I am again facing another frustration because of the process’s complexities. But these frustrations are implications that I am trying so hard to give value to the paper I am working on. I want it to be something that will have global significance, highlighting local relevance.
I hope I can pull this off.
Sleepless nights are waving, and I need to keep myself healthy and productive because there are still many plans to realize.
Progress is not linear, but at least I am moving closer to my dreams one step at a time.